I made sweet tea today for the first time in a month, and the taste is so familiar and yet so unfamiliar.
I find I miss my job from last summer. I miss the work of it sometimes. It's so different from my work right now.
It is really hard for me to lie, especially about how I'm feeling about school.
I'm grateful to live in this day and age, one with airplanes for visits with friends, the internet for communicating with friends, and cars to go home.
Tomas, my shamrock, is not doing so well, because I haven't had the time to re-repot him. And the surprising part is, I don't fully care. It's really strange to me. Ever since I've repotted him, he seems foreign to me.
Time never passes slower as when you have a take home midterm to work on.
The chill in the air outside is refreshing.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Wednesday, October 24, 2007
Up for air
Well, one midterm and one problem set down, another midterm and two problem sets to go
before next Wednesday. I had a fabulous weekend last weekend though, you can see pics of all the fun here. Yes I know we had fun taking these pictures. It was so great to be with the BWC people again, but a little weird to be touring NYC at the same time :). We still had plenty of fun, and I'm so glad I took the time to go. I went pumpkin picking today, as it's getting to be that time, and the leaves are absolutely beautiful in upstate NY (I'm sure elsewhere too).
There's not really much to say, as all the math has left me very little time to think, which is a good thing. The insanity ends next week, and the end will not come too soon. I'm definitely ready to be done being a first year. Next semester looks much better. Although, we did manage to get in a game of Dutch Blitz during our very brief break this morning, and it was quite fun. It had been too long... and now back to work.
before next Wednesday. I had a fabulous weekend last weekend though, you can see pics of all the fun here. Yes I know we had fun taking these pictures. It was so great to be with the BWC people again, but a little weird to be touring NYC at the same time :). We still had plenty of fun, and I'm so glad I took the time to go. I went pumpkin picking today, as it's getting to be that time, and the leaves are absolutely beautiful in upstate NY (I'm sure elsewhere too).There's not really much to say, as all the math has left me very little time to think, which is a good thing. The insanity ends next week, and the end will not come too soon. I'm definitely ready to be done being a first year. Next semester looks much better. Although, we did manage to get in a game of Dutch Blitz during our very brief break this morning, and it was quite fun. It had been too long... and now back to work.
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
CAM
Well, everyone, in case you didn't know, October is Celiac Awareness Month! And in honor of CAM, CNN is doing a special this week about Celiac Disease. I watched the segment from yesterday, and I was amused at how many clips of people eating that they showed. But, if you feel like tuning into CNN this week (some time between 9 am and noon, not convenient times for most I know), they're having special segments every day this week about celiac. Here's the schedule:
Monday: What is celiac disease?
Dr. Aline Charabaty of Georgetown University Medical Center's Division of Gastroenterology will join CNN's Heidi Collins in the Newsroom to discuss the basics of celiac disease, diagnosis and treatment with a gluten-free diet.
Tuesday: "Non-Gastrointestinal Complications of Celiac Disease."
Dr. Richard Mandel of the Center for Advanced Orthopedics in Philadelphia will discuss the orthopedic complications of celiac disease and celiac patients can improve bone health. Also in the CNN Newsroom, Dr. Robert Mangione, dean of the St. Johns University College of Pharmacy, will explain how gluten in medication can impact celiac patients and discuss the immediate need for labeling of gluten in medication.
Wednesday: "Gluten-Free School Lunches."
Rep. Steve Kagen (D-WI) will offer tips for safely sending celiac children to school and federal school lunch requirements to provide gluten-free meals.
Thursday: "Hope with Celiac Disease."
Vanessa Maltin of the National Foundation for Celiac Awareness and Beyond Rice Cakes author will be on CNN discussing new resources available to help patients cope with celiac disease including cookbooks, video podcasts, cupcake parties and celiac camps.
Friday: "Gluten-Free Dining in Restaurants."
Tips for managing food allergies at restaurants and how patients can ensure a safe dining experience.
Monday: What is celiac disease?
Dr. Aline Charabaty of Georgetown University Medical Center's Division of Gastroenterology will join CNN's Heidi Collins in the Newsroom to discuss the basics of celiac disease, diagnosis and treatment with a gluten-free diet.
Tuesday: "Non-Gastrointestinal Complications of Celiac Disease."
Dr. Richard Mandel of the Center for Advanced Orthopedics in Philadelphia will discuss the orthopedic complications of celiac disease and celiac patients can improve bone health. Also in the CNN Newsroom, Dr. Robert Mangione, dean of the St. Johns University College of Pharmacy, will explain how gluten in medication can impact celiac patients and discuss the immediate need for labeling of gluten in medication.
Wednesday: "Gluten-Free School Lunches."
Rep. Steve Kagen (D-WI) will offer tips for safely sending celiac children to school and federal school lunch requirements to provide gluten-free meals.
Thursday: "Hope with Celiac Disease."
Vanessa Maltin of the National Foundation for Celiac Awareness and Beyond Rice Cakes author will be on CNN discussing new resources available to help patients cope with celiac disease including cookbooks, video podcasts, cupcake parties and celiac camps.
Friday: "Gluten-Free Dining in Restaurants."
Tips for managing food allergies at restaurants and how patients can ensure a safe dining experience.
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Approaching the difficult
The past few weeks have been quite incredible. Going home for Fall Break, working hard before and after so that I could my three days of no math. Tonight I wrote up a set of solutions that had such hard work behind them, that it was such a feeling of victory as I re-wrote and read everything. I remembered all the frustration, all the giggles, all the jokes, all the "No, wait a minute"s. We've really fallen into a rhythm working together, that all our problem sets are really group efforts. But tomorrow, tomorrow is the day that we have to stop working together for a while and conquer midterms. The next two weeks will be alone mathematics time, and it will be interesting. But my weekends will be great.
When I went home for Fall Break, I went through some old pictures of my life pre age 7. For some reason I just wanted to see them. And I brought a few home, one of which is now above my desk to remind me of the complete joy and excitement that are in life if you can just recognize it. I was absolutely happy in this picture, really in all the pictures I saw. Favorites included: old man lounging, LOOK! it's my baby sister!, and the crayons on the sweatshirt. Recently I felt so removed from my childhood self, that I wanted to reconnect those bonds. It's good to remember myself as a child. Oh, and try explaining to a 4 year old why parents are always older than their children. That's a fun one that I don't really know how I got into.
Your tidbit of analysis for the evening: An absolutely continuous function maps measurable sets to measurable sets, and if F is of bounded variation, then the integral of the absolute value of its derivative is equal to its total variation if and only if F is absolutely continuous.
I hope you've enjoyed Analysis in the Evening, thanks for joining us. And if you want to know why those things are true, I can definitely tell you, thanks to Team Table (and Team Theorem)!
When I went home for Fall Break, I went through some old pictures of my life pre age 7. For some reason I just wanted to see them. And I brought a few home, one of which is now above my desk to remind me of the complete joy and excitement that are in life if you can just recognize it. I was absolutely happy in this picture, really in all the pictures I saw. Favorites included: old man lounging, LOOK! it's my baby sister!, and the crayons on the sweatshirt. Recently I felt so removed from my childhood self, that I wanted to reconnect those bonds. It's good to remember myself as a child. Oh, and try explaining to a 4 year old why parents are always older than their children. That's a fun one that I don't really know how I got into.
Your tidbit of analysis for the evening: An absolutely continuous function maps measurable sets to measurable sets, and if F is of bounded variation, then the integral of the absolute value of its derivative is equal to its total variation if and only if F is absolutely continuous.
I hope you've enjoyed Analysis in the Evening, thanks for joining us. And if you want to know why those things are true, I can definitely tell you, thanks to Team Table (and Team Theorem)!
Friday, September 28, 2007
More from The Female Brain
I've started the teenage chapter of the book, and it's been an interesting read...
On a study by the Pittsburgh Psychobiologic Studies Center:
"Males and females become reactive to different kinds of stress. Girls begin to react more to relationship stresses and boys to challenges to their authority. Relationship conflict is what drives a teen girl's stress system wild. She needs to be liked and socially connected; a teen boy needs to be respected and higher in the male pecking order."
"Robert Josephs at the University of Texas has concluded that men's self-esteem derives more from their ability to maintain independence from others, while women's self-esteem is maintained, in part, by the ability to sustain intimate relationships with others."
In terms of reactions to stress...
"...females appear to have some stress responses in addition to 'fight or flight' that allow them to protect themselves and their dependent children. One such response may be reliance on social ties. Females in a bonded social group are more likely to come to one another's aid in a threatening or stressful situation.... This pattern of behavior is termed 'tend and befriend'."
I like the idea of "tend and befriend" much better than "fight or flight". It definitely makes sense with my reactions to stress. My senior year, whenever I was stressed at school, I would go and play with the two little boys to "remind me what is important". Those were my words that I used to explain it once. Interesting idea here.
On a more personal note, it seems like half the people in my little world are sick right now, including myself (though happily I am so much better than I was at the beginning of the week). This crazy weather, I have a feeling, has a big part in the many illnesses spreading. Plus, it's prelim season for the undergrads, so there's lots of stress in the air. So, time to hit the open road and have a refreshing weekend!
On a study by the Pittsburgh Psychobiologic Studies Center:
"Males and females become reactive to different kinds of stress. Girls begin to react more to relationship stresses and boys to challenges to their authority. Relationship conflict is what drives a teen girl's stress system wild. She needs to be liked and socially connected; a teen boy needs to be respected and higher in the male pecking order."
"Robert Josephs at the University of Texas has concluded that men's self-esteem derives more from their ability to maintain independence from others, while women's self-esteem is maintained, in part, by the ability to sustain intimate relationships with others."
In terms of reactions to stress...
"...females appear to have some stress responses in addition to 'fight or flight' that allow them to protect themselves and their dependent children. One such response may be reliance on social ties. Females in a bonded social group are more likely to come to one another's aid in a threatening or stressful situation.... This pattern of behavior is termed 'tend and befriend'."
I like the idea of "tend and befriend" much better than "fight or flight". It definitely makes sense with my reactions to stress. My senior year, whenever I was stressed at school, I would go and play with the two little boys to "remind me what is important". Those were my words that I used to explain it once. Interesting idea here.
On a more personal note, it seems like half the people in my little world are sick right now, including myself (though happily I am so much better than I was at the beginning of the week). This crazy weather, I have a feeling, has a big part in the many illnesses spreading. Plus, it's prelim season for the undergrads, so there's lots of stress in the air. So, time to hit the open road and have a refreshing weekend!
Thursday, September 20, 2007
Zenzele
Zenzele, by J. Mozipo Naraire, takes the form of a letter from a mother to her daughter, as the daughter is about to leave her childhood home of Zimbabwe and travel to the US for the first time for school. It's been an interesting read, very different and yet similar to Eat, Pray, Love. A passage I ran across today while waiting in the dentist chair, a story told by the mother's mother to her which the mother is now passing along to the daughter:
"Shiri [a pet name for the mother], at the end of the day you will meet only two men in your life: One will make your hands tremble; the other will make them steady. The first will be your passion of youth, but like the blazing fires of the bush, it will soon die to glowing embers, then cool ashes. The second will enter your life quietly, like a thief in the night. He will be like the mighty trees in the forest that we don not see before us, yet they are there, strong and tall; in rain and sun, they dig their roots deep and shade us with their leaves. It is the second one who you must marry. He will be a good husband and father to your children."
Another passage, when the daughter asks the mother, "What do you think it means to be an African woman?" (and I think this can apply to any woman):
"It is to be strong, Zenzele. It is to be at peace within. You must always listen to that inner voice and not permit others to drown it out. It is to measure your words; to balance your works with your gifts carefully; it is in some ways to be selfless, to serve others yet to know and defend your rights to the bitter end."
"Shiri [a pet name for the mother], at the end of the day you will meet only two men in your life: One will make your hands tremble; the other will make them steady. The first will be your passion of youth, but like the blazing fires of the bush, it will soon die to glowing embers, then cool ashes. The second will enter your life quietly, like a thief in the night. He will be like the mighty trees in the forest that we don not see before us, yet they are there, strong and tall; in rain and sun, they dig their roots deep and shade us with their leaves. It is the second one who you must marry. He will be a good husband and father to your children."
Another passage, when the daughter asks the mother, "What do you think it means to be an African woman?" (and I think this can apply to any woman):
"It is to be strong, Zenzele. It is to be at peace within. You must always listen to that inner voice and not permit others to drown it out. It is to measure your words; to balance your works with your gifts carefully; it is in some ways to be selfless, to serve others yet to know and defend your rights to the bitter end."
The Female Brain
This afternoon I began a book called "The Female Brain", at the recommendation of my mother who's also reading it. I was a little skeptical, felt like it could be a little too preachy or "fluffy". But, at least the first 4 pages have not been that. It's in fact a rather amusing read.
From the front cover:
"It's not as if we all start out with the same brain structure. They are different by nature. Think about this. What if the communication center is bigger in one brain than the other? What if the
emotional memory center if bigger in one brain than the other? What if one brain develops a greater ability to read cues in people than another? In this case, you would have a person whose reality dictated that communication, connection, emotional sensitivity, and responsiveness were the primary values. This person would prize these qualities above all others and be baffled by another person with a brain that didn't grasp the importance of these qualities. In essence, you would have someone with a female brain." -Excerpt
"Every brain begins as a female brain. It only becomes male eight weeks after conception, when excess testosterone shrinks the communication center, reduces the hearing cortex, and makes the part of the brain that processes sex twice as large." -Jacket blurb
Talking about the fluctuations in hormone levels in a woman's brain:
"Because of the fluctuations that begin as early as three months old and last until after menopause, a woman's neurological reality is not as constant as a man's. His is like a mountain that is worn away imperceptibly over the millenia by glaciers, weather, and the deep tectonic movements of the earth. Hers is more like the weather itself -- constantly changing and hard to predict."
This analogy made me smile and giggle inside.
I think my blog is mostly going to become a collection of quotes, since I seem to be finding a lot of things that make me say, "Exactly!" Or, "Ohhhh, that makes more sense now!" or "Wow, that's an interesting way of seeing things." So, if anyone still reads this, I hope you enjoy.
From the front cover:
"It's not as if we all start out with the same brain structure. They are different by nature. Think about this. What if the communication center is bigger in one brain than the other? What if the
emotional memory center if bigger in one brain than the other? What if one brain develops a greater ability to read cues in people than another? In this case, you would have a person whose reality dictated that communication, connection, emotional sensitivity, and responsiveness were the primary values. This person would prize these qualities above all others and be baffled by another person with a brain that didn't grasp the importance of these qualities. In essence, you would have someone with a female brain." -Excerpt"Every brain begins as a female brain. It only becomes male eight weeks after conception, when excess testosterone shrinks the communication center, reduces the hearing cortex, and makes the part of the brain that processes sex twice as large." -Jacket blurb
Talking about the fluctuations in hormone levels in a woman's brain:
"Because of the fluctuations that begin as early as three months old and last until after menopause, a woman's neurological reality is not as constant as a man's. His is like a mountain that is worn away imperceptibly over the millenia by glaciers, weather, and the deep tectonic movements of the earth. Hers is more like the weather itself -- constantly changing and hard to predict."
This analogy made me smile and giggle inside.
I think my blog is mostly going to become a collection of quotes, since I seem to be finding a lot of things that make me say, "Exactly!" Or, "Ohhhh, that makes more sense now!" or "Wow, that's an interesting way of seeing things." So, if anyone still reads this, I hope you enjoy.
Saturday, September 15, 2007
Are you what you think?
"The mind is just a reflex organ. It reacts to everything. Fills your head with millions of random thoughts a day. None of those thoughts reveal any more about you than a freckle does at the end of your nose." -Peaceful Warrior
I was intrigued by this quote in the movie "Peaceful Warrior." I appreciate the sentiment of it, but I don't fully agree with it. I think that our thoughts do have an effect on our "self", however you wish to define your "self". Of course we don't usually control every thought that comes into our minds, but we can decide what to put into our minds (our entertainment, our course of study, our discussions), what to experience, what to focus on, which will in turn affect our thoughts. The Baha'i Writings say a lot about the effect that positive thoughts can have, and the effect of negative ones as well. They can either uplift one's spirit, and those around him, or weight it down. Our minds have incredible capacity for progress and also for indulgent fantasies.
"The mind and the thought of man sometimes discover truths, and from this thought and discovery signs and results are produced. This thought has a foundation. But many things come to the mind of man which are like the waves of the sea of imaginations; they have no fruit, and no result comes from them. In the same way, man sees in the world of sleep a vision which becomes exactly realized; at another time, he sees a dream which has absolutely no result. " -'Abdu'l-Baha
Our mind has great capacity for meaningful thoughts that do determine the person we become, but also a great capacity for silliness and frivolous thought. I think the important thing, the one that can determine who a person is, is the balance between these. Which kind is held as important and which is more frequent. I have numerous ridiculous thoughts a day, but I don't consider myself a ridiculous person.
I thought this was another interesting point:
"All the people have formed a god in the world of thought, and that form of their own imagination they worship; when the fact is that the imagined form is finite and the human mind is infinite. Surely the infinite is greater than the finite, for imagination is accidental (or non-essential) while the mind is essential; surely the essential is greater than the accidental." -'Abdu'l-Baha
On a similar note, our thoughts can definitely influence reality in the sense that if we continually think, "I'm worthless, I'll never do well," then you most likely won't. There's a weight on your spirit and mind, and that will affect your productivity and creativity. If you constantly criticize yourself, sooner or later that will come out in your actions. You lose confidence in your own ability, you are timid in your approaches, and that fear and anxiousness can cause you to perform far below your capacity. It's amazing how gullible I can be sometimes, in believing in my thoughts. After some time passes, it's easier to step back and think, "Why in the world did I believe those thoughts? That's simply ridiculous!" We spend so much time in our heads that it's natural for us to start believing it. And we'll tend to believe ourselves more than the others around us. Different images from books I've read are flashing through my mind. We have a great capacity to punish ourselves, and when someone else says to us, "Come on, ______, don't do that to yourself. You deserve so much more." Our minds are ready to say, "Well, why should I listen to them, they don't know that I ________________" and we give ourselves reasons to believe our own selves over the people we love. This was something I really appreciated in Eat, Pray, Love, she really communicated the struggles she had within herself and the reaction of those around her. And in Maeve Binchy's Nights of Rain and Stars, the idea that it's so much easier to look at someone else's life and see what they should do and how they should react, but within one's own life it's so much harder. For personal experience, I realize just how defensive I can become, and that gets converted into a very heavy energy weighing on me and breaking me down. When, in fact, I think our defenses should build ourselves up, fortify our strength, draw on the resources that we have. God has created us noble and powerful. He's created us in His image, and resides in our hearts.
"O SON OF SPIRIT!
I created thee rich, why dost thou bring thyself down to poverty? Noble I made thee, wherewith dost thou abase thyself? Out of the essence of knowledge I gave thee being, why seekest thou enlightenment from anyone beside Me? Out of the clay of love I molded thee, how dost thou busy thyself with another? Turn thy sight unto thyself, that thou mayest find Me standing within thee, mighty, powerful and self-subsisting." -Baha'u'llah
"Turn thy sight unto thyself, that thou mayest find Me standing within thee..." I like that image. God is infinite, a Being our words are too limited to describe. The entire universe cannot contain Him, but our hearts can! "Neither doth My earth nor My heaven contain Me, but the heart of My faithful servant containeth Me." -Baha'u'llah
"Knowledge is of two kinds. One is subjective and the other objective knowledge -- that is to say, an intuitive knowledge and a knowledge derived from perception.
The knowledge of things which men universally have is gained by reflection or by evidence -- that is to say, either by the power of the mind the conception of an object is formed, or from beholding an object the form is produced in the mirror of the heart. The circle of this knowledge is very limited because it depends upon effort and attainment.
But the second sort of knowledge, which is the knowledge of being, is intuitive; it is like the cognizance and consciousness that man has of himself." -'Abdu'l-Baha
I was intrigued by this quote in the movie "Peaceful Warrior." I appreciate the sentiment of it, but I don't fully agree with it. I think that our thoughts do have an effect on our "self", however you wish to define your "self". Of course we don't usually control every thought that comes into our minds, but we can decide what to put into our minds (our entertainment, our course of study, our discussions), what to experience, what to focus on, which will in turn affect our thoughts. The Baha'i Writings say a lot about the effect that positive thoughts can have, and the effect of negative ones as well. They can either uplift one's spirit, and those around him, or weight it down. Our minds have incredible capacity for progress and also for indulgent fantasies.
"The mind and the thought of man sometimes discover truths, and from this thought and discovery signs and results are produced. This thought has a foundation. But many things come to the mind of man which are like the waves of the sea of imaginations; they have no fruit, and no result comes from them. In the same way, man sees in the world of sleep a vision which becomes exactly realized; at another time, he sees a dream which has absolutely no result. " -'Abdu'l-Baha
Our mind has great capacity for meaningful thoughts that do determine the person we become, but also a great capacity for silliness and frivolous thought. I think the important thing, the one that can determine who a person is, is the balance between these. Which kind is held as important and which is more frequent. I have numerous ridiculous thoughts a day, but I don't consider myself a ridiculous person.
I thought this was another interesting point:
"All the people have formed a god in the world of thought, and that form of their own imagination they worship; when the fact is that the imagined form is finite and the human mind is infinite. Surely the infinite is greater than the finite, for imagination is accidental (or non-essential) while the mind is essential; surely the essential is greater than the accidental." -'Abdu'l-Baha
On a similar note, our thoughts can definitely influence reality in the sense that if we continually think, "I'm worthless, I'll never do well," then you most likely won't. There's a weight on your spirit and mind, and that will affect your productivity and creativity. If you constantly criticize yourself, sooner or later that will come out in your actions. You lose confidence in your own ability, you are timid in your approaches, and that fear and anxiousness can cause you to perform far below your capacity. It's amazing how gullible I can be sometimes, in believing in my thoughts. After some time passes, it's easier to step back and think, "Why in the world did I believe those thoughts? That's simply ridiculous!" We spend so much time in our heads that it's natural for us to start believing it. And we'll tend to believe ourselves more than the others around us. Different images from books I've read are flashing through my mind. We have a great capacity to punish ourselves, and when someone else says to us, "Come on, ______, don't do that to yourself. You deserve so much more." Our minds are ready to say, "Well, why should I listen to them, they don't know that I ________________" and we give ourselves reasons to believe our own selves over the people we love. This was something I really appreciated in Eat, Pray, Love, she really communicated the struggles she had within herself and the reaction of those around her. And in Maeve Binchy's Nights of Rain and Stars, the idea that it's so much easier to look at someone else's life and see what they should do and how they should react, but within one's own life it's so much harder. For personal experience, I realize just how defensive I can become, and that gets converted into a very heavy energy weighing on me and breaking me down. When, in fact, I think our defenses should build ourselves up, fortify our strength, draw on the resources that we have. God has created us noble and powerful. He's created us in His image, and resides in our hearts.
"O SON OF SPIRIT!
I created thee rich, why dost thou bring thyself down to poverty? Noble I made thee, wherewith dost thou abase thyself? Out of the essence of knowledge I gave thee being, why seekest thou enlightenment from anyone beside Me? Out of the clay of love I molded thee, how dost thou busy thyself with another? Turn thy sight unto thyself, that thou mayest find Me standing within thee, mighty, powerful and self-subsisting." -Baha'u'llah
"Turn thy sight unto thyself, that thou mayest find Me standing within thee..." I like that image. God is infinite, a Being our words are too limited to describe. The entire universe cannot contain Him, but our hearts can! "Neither doth My earth nor My heaven contain Me, but the heart of My faithful servant containeth Me." -Baha'u'llah
"Knowledge is of two kinds. One is subjective and the other objective knowledge -- that is to say, an intuitive knowledge and a knowledge derived from perception.
The knowledge of things which men universally have is gained by reflection or by evidence -- that is to say, either by the power of the mind the conception of an object is formed, or from beholding an object the form is produced in the mirror of the heart. The circle of this knowledge is very limited because it depends upon effort and attainment.
But the second sort of knowledge, which is the knowledge of being, is intuitive; it is like the cognizance and consciousness that man has of himself." -'Abdu'l-Baha
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