it takes more than a few days

So, yesterday as I was desperately trying to understand analysis and finish a problem set, this song (Big Strong Girl by Deb Talan, a favorite), yet again, described so much of the position I was in or hoping to be true:
"it's not now or never
it's not black & it's not white
anything worth anything
takes more than a few days
& a long, long night

don't push so hard against the world
you can't do it all alone
& if you could, would you really want to?
even though you're a big strong girl,
come on, come on, lay it down
the best made plans
come on, come on, lay it down
are your open hands

rest your head
you've got two pillows to choose from
& a queen size bed
hold out for the moon
don't expect connection anytime soon
feel the light caress your fingertips
you have just begun
the word has only left your lips
maybe in time, you will find
your arms are wrapped around the sun

don't push so hard against the world, no, no
you can't do it all alone
& if you could, would you really want to?
even though you're a big strong girl,
come on, come on, lay it down
the best made plans
come on, come on, lay it down
are your open hands
are your open hands"
I liked the image of wrapping my arms around the sun. It seemed like an empowering, comforting thing, to be able to embrace that warmth, that power, that source of life. I can't do it all alone, so my best plan should be open hands. When feeling completely overwhelmed with the situation, I left the math building and found a secluded bench to sit and listen to music before sitting through Topology. I got to listen to music, to write, and to think about all the lovely things I have to look forward to :). To name a few, going to Green Acre at the end of the month, a concert this Friday by David Hunt (a Baha'i guitarist who I thoroughly enjoy), going home for Fall Break, including seeing friends, family, munchkins, eating Moe's several times, getting Marble Slab (hopefully including pumpkin ice cream!), a visit from the lovely Henderson St. ladies, and the DC Baha'i Congress over Thanksgiving for which I am volunteering! Amazing things await me in the next few weeks/months. I cannot wait to give big hugs to everyone... I love you all very much, and the thought of seeing your smiling faces again warms my heart to get through the not so fun homework times.
Yesterday afternoon I walked home through the gorge, and sat down about halfway down and just stared at the water and the falls while listening to my Baha'i music. It was an awesome place to meditate. The water is beautiful, flowing in almost exactly the same way, though to each drop of water, it's a brand new experience. It's so easy for us to see how that drop of water fits into the whole, where it's going. And the drops of water could be flowing together for a while and then get separated but they keep flowing. So, even though I am far from those I love, I'm going to keep flowing ;), and I'll end up where I need to be, where I can serve best. And I never know what's just around the bend. If you couldn't tell from my blogs, I'm drawing a lot of inspiration and refreshment from the water in the gorge these days :). It's one of the big reasons that I love Ithaca so much. Ithaca is gorges.
Alrighty, enough of a break. It's been a good day so far, the problem set is in, classes are done, my toilet is fixed, the topology assignment is done, recitation is almost planned, and dinner is in the oven. Woo hoo! I feel accomplished. Just another 5 or 6 hours, and I'll be ready for tomorrow!